March 6th, 2013 Laguna Lounging

I’m writing this from Laguna Beach. Well, not exactly, as I’m merely forming the idea for the blog in my head, without my computer here because of the sand and sun. I’m continually distracted by diving silky seals, dolphins, surfers waiting for waves, and people walking up and down and up the beach again. I’ve been in the exact same spot for hours. Lee’s working and I have had the entire day to myself, without a phone, or a message. It’s sublime. I’ve lit candles in our hotel room, meditated, practiced twenty minutes of yoga and then greeted the sun at the beach, running for thirty minutes before going in search of something to eat. I’ve tried more than once to return to the hotel room which is lovely, tiled with an overgrowth of Southern California foliage. I can’t stay. I’m supposed to be writing, but the sea keeps calling and the heat feels so good on my vitamin-d deficient winter -  in -  Colorado – body. The time of day for writing has almost come to a close, and yet, I’ve not begun. I’m stuck again, I’m at the point in the memoir where I’m supposed to slay the one and only dragon, to conquer my biggest fear, to address my core issue…only I haven’t identified it. I’ve asked everyone who knows me to help me identify it. That wasn’t smart. They identified a version of their core issue, projected onto me! We’re such reflection of one another, aren’t we?  So, I’ve spent the day, wandering, walking, wondering about this magnificent existential conundrum. I could feel guilty or that it’s been a waste of time, but somehow it feels perfect. I’m having to soul search and what could be a more perfect backdrop to the plunge into my subconscious, than the sea herself? Plus, I’m reading Paulo Coelho’s novel, which I picked up at DIA and didn’t know was about my very same theme. If you have a chance to make it to the ocean soon, do it and do nothing and everything at once! Tomorrow, I might figure it out, or not.

No Comments »

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL

Leave a comment